April 26th, 2008 by Remcyl

My youth has been one of the best phases of my life. I have spent everyday waking up, ready and excited to play with my cousins. I remember clearly how I would be the patriarch of the group. Everyone follows my lead and I would play the role of the adult. I was the teacher when we were playing school classes, the priest of our church (our church was the swing we had at our backyard), their “mother” bird, elephant, dinosaur. I’ve been the mother of almost every single animal in the wild.

As I grew, our games became less. But if ever we did get the chance to, our games were more of the mature kind. We would play mind games imitating the latest in game shows where the one who gets to answer moves one step forward, one of the 20 steps before he/she gets the prize. I saw the willingness my cousins were willing to make with the growth I had and how much they’re enjoying it.

When it was their turn to go to school, I played a role I never expected to be capable of, I was their tutor with their school subjects. For me, everything I’ve learned came very easy to teach and I was so proud of myself for having the chance to pass the wisdom to them at such an early age. I made questionnaires that they would answer after every lecture I’ve finished similar to the types they give at their classes. At that moment, I envisioned myself as an advocate to children when I grow up, giving hope to those who can’t afford.

Months had passed and I was saddened by the news that my cousins had to leave the country to finally be with their mom after being parted for so long. It was difficult for me and I was not able to move on quickly. I cry at their room reminiscing on the times we played pretend that they were commercial models and I was their Nigel Barker. I cried at the bathroom where I bathed them and scrubbed their skins after the day’s dirt. I could barely eat after realizing that my cousins who used to share plates with me are not around anymore. It’s as if I died and no one even cared, nor could I do anything about it.

But time dried my tears, and I’ve kept every single pain in the subconscious. I was about to face the world where games are a lot different. For the first time, I had no idea on how the game was played. Rules were more complex and this time, I was not to lead but to play.

My mother often told me how difficult school life could be, but how the wise could easily pass victoriously. It wasn’t for the faint-hearted, nor was it for cowards. Academics, extra-curricular, peers were all jam packed into this game I had to play. I had moments where I doubted myself, but was forced to try for I had no other choice. The responsibilities I used to have were now bigger than who I am. The confidence that used to exude in me is now a shadow behind me.

I am now stressed. For I wasn’t ready for this kind of life. No. No one told me it would be this hard, yet no one said it wasn’t going to be easy anyway.

The game I play now, I’ve learned, is called life.

The rules are quite easy, but playing it is the challenge. I play with different people everyday. Hundreds this day, another hundred the next. Some play fair, while others choose to do otherwise. I build a support team who runs with me through the phase and joins me through each accomplishment. Most of the time, I fall, commit mistakes, and fail. But I can’t stop now. Now that I’ve gone this far, I am not throwing away my life’s worth.

As I look back, I really miss being a kid. And I say that with tears rolling down my eyes which only justifies how much I mean it.

I miss the days when all I had to do was to wake up each day and worry about what game I was to play with my cousins. I miss the days when my parents were the ones to make the decisions for me when life’s questions was too mature for me to handle. I miss having the people around me whenever I need a shoulder to cry on when life turns out to be unfair. We all miss those days no matter how much we deny it.

Then I’ve realized that I’m 21 years old now and no matter how much reminiscing I was to flash through my head, I could never have the strength in me to turn back time and live my life as a kid. Now, I have to make decisions that would affect not only me, but the ones around me as well.

After all, the game I now play is life. How could I ever make it through the finish line if I would choose to remain as a kid and be stagnant and left behind. I sure do miss being a kid, but what awaits me ahead only makes the missing a knock on the head that life could still be fun despite it’s challenges.

See you on the finish line.

April 25th, 2008 by Remcyl

Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!

April 24th, 2008 by Remcyl

So I think it’s being pretty clear that I’m getting bored. (I am sooo bored I had the time to individually color this ginormous heading!)

For today, and today only, I’ve checked my mailbox 5 times, bloghopped for right about 9 hours, read entries on those blogs for about half of how long I’ve bloghopped, and constantly living my life as a pig. Yes, buhay baboy as what Filipinos would call it. The life where you wake up in the morning, eat, watch TV, nap, eat again, watch some more, do some net surfing, have a snack. . . Aw you get it, a typical day for a lazy person like my sister who’s literally a pig.

And I’m tired of it!
When I was still in school (not that I ain’t anymore), I use to complain about the long days I’ve been having going non-stop with studying and doing homeworks and all that crap. About how I never get the chance to rest or at least do something for myself once in a while, you know, where you get to bathe in the cool waters of the faucet (third world style of a cold bath in a tub) something like that. I was pretty much bombarded with all the city pressure to keep this short.

They always say, man will never be in a state of contentment. And for the past few days, I have to agree.

When faced with both extremes, man will always go look for something out of the ordinary. We complain when we’re busy, and we complain when we have the luxury we were asking for when we can’t afford it. Frankly, I’d rather have the former if I were you.

I mean just think about this.

I remember on the first day after finding out that I flunked my NCM 102 and that I have to transfer to a new school, I felt like the most useless person in the world that all I can do is help my mom out with the house chores. Not that anything’s wrong with that because my mom deserves a break anyway. But I just know I can do more help than just that. With my talent (not bragging here), I certainly must have the brains to think of something to do with them, right?

A fashion designer, hair stylist, and graphic artist-wanna be… What am I doing? ponder

So this morning I was surfing YouTube remember? Hence the earlier post of “If Only”, and it had several versions of the song and one of them focused on the soldiers in Iraq fighting for . . .(what are they fighting for again?). I cried as though I too had a family member out there fighting with the troops. I cried as though I was one of the many families hoping that my dad would come home safe and alive.

Another video on the other end focused on homeless people and those affected by poverty. It pretty much spoke to those who complains about not being able to eat at a fine restaurant, or about not being able to have a pool on their backyard, when others worry about not being able to eat after being hungry for a week, or worries about not having the shelter they have when the next typhoon strikes.

What’s the point with all these words?

The point is, we CAN DO SOMETHING.

With the amount of talent, and the numerous people given the power to influence others with their popularity, we certainly can build bridges and reach out.

For now, I may not be able to feed the hungry, or provide a home to those sleeping on the streets as I type, but the thing is, we can start with a single step.

The problem with people sometime is that, we look forward to results by asking the work to be done by others. Some only start when a leader stands up. As they always say, we should start within ourselves.

Let’s start today, and let me hear the good deeds you’ve done giving a priceless smile to those whom you’ve helped.

Send your stories by writing to us at abrahamremcyl@gmail.com

April 24th, 2008 by Remcyl

It’s 11:48 in the morning and I’m crying my heart out after watching this video. I hope everyone could be touched by the video’s message the same way I was.

Just beautiful…Sigh!

April 24th, 2008 by Remcyl

Right after finishing the two additions to my portfolio as a graphic designer (2 banner samples for Thad), I got the chance to chat with him over GTalk and got to know each other a bit more.

Right after discussing our dreams in the future and mentioned that he is an aspiring writer, he told me about a great web site that I should join because of its great vision for the gay community, Pinoy Gay Blogs. I asked him what it was for and who manages the entire thing and told me that the genius behind Manila Gay Guy is the genius behind the entire concept.

I’ve never had my site reviewed by anyone other than myself (who believe me, has never admitted that at times my site has some what-was-I-thinking moments believing that everything’s perfect LOL) and having a site to do just that was great news.  But putting that aside, I have loved the whole concept of the site which was to bring the gay community united. Whether you’re discreet, blatant, a tranny, confused, or plainly just gay, you’re welcome.

I remember the exact day when I bumped into Kuya AJ’s blog and saw how proud he was of saying he was gay. I was always proud of who I am but was somehow scared to let the whole world know (given that I do accept the fact that we, the gay community, could not be accepted by everybody). But there he was, proud as ever. Which gave me the sudden boost and push I needed.

At that time, I was contemplating on a domain name. I couldn’t go back to my previous one, remcylviloria.com because I want to try something new. So after asking for permission from Kuya Aj if it was okay for me to use BadingAko.com, I didn’t think twice and bought the domain. It was surely a purchase I never regretted.

Now I have this power. With this power comes the responsibility of making good use of it. I’ve realized, if Kuya Aj was able to inspire me and others in being proud of who we truly are, then with these little steps, we definitely can move mountains.

Pinoy Gay Blogs gives gay bloggers the chance they deserve, the respect they deserve, the acceptance they’ve been deprived of. I joined Pinoy Gay Blogs for the right reason. Not to gain traffic or whatnot, but to add to the growing list of incomparable talented people in the fight that one day, be considered like everyone else who deserves respect.

April 22nd, 2008 by Remcyl

So for today, I was supposed to look for a job but I found a great web site which pays so much better while I’m waiting for June (which by the way is far from tomorrow, Augh!) so I just stayed home and watch some good ol’ TV.

Out of the blue my mom told me we were going out together. The usual place would either be the market, the bank, or the hospital. But today, she wanted to go to the mall and gallivant. Something new alright. At first I wanted to clarify to her that I didn’t want her doing this just so I wouldn’t pity myself after flunking my NCM 102.

So anyways, we were off with my sister, who was such a good sport for being my paparazzi today, the day I decided to camwhore.

Pictures after the jump…

Read the rest of this entry »

April 18th, 2008 by Remcyl

New Video Link!

Please do check out my videos in my YouTube Player on the video link found at the top of this site. I’m so glad to have you, my readers, have access to all my videos right here without having to view all of them individually on YouTube’s site. So do check them out.

New Exchange!

Also, I’d like to welcome two new links on my blogroll, Dave and Jepoy Go who’s writings justifies the need for them to be included in my list.

Coif by Remcyl Viloria

After the long days of reviewing for the final examinations, I must say I’m pretty amped up to blog. I miss my life so much. Yes, for me, school life is no life at all. It’s only a preparation to the real deal so this to me is pretty much like life in Hollywood. Fake and hiding behind the curtains and yet everyone seems to want to have a taste of it. I once did too, but I grew out of it.

Anyways, I went back to my inner stylist and decided to do what I do best, cut hair!

Butterflies pretty much surrounded my stomach since it’s been so long since I last did a haircut. But I knew I still had it in me. The Nursing course might be all what I do right now, but my talent remains in my soul (how deep LOL). I really had fun doing the hair of my 4 clients namely, my mom (who was my most meticulous client so far), my sister (who pretty much had a $700-free make-over just because I’m his gay brother), Maricar (who gave me the most publicity with her mouth), and Rizza (who by far has the thickesthair I had to work with! Talk about gazillion layers!)

Pictures would come soon if I could get them to do a gorgeous photo shoot with me.

YouTube Views!

Archuleta’s Best!

So now that I have more free time in my hands, I finally got to surf my favorite video site next to XTube (wink! just kidding…or not) and show you what I’ve been sitting to all day long.

So I’ve always fell in love with Daviad Archuleta the moment I saw his audition on AI and I even planned in making this site of mine a sort of unofficial fansite of his but never really had the chance to work on it due to my busy school schedule. Anyways, I always admired his ability in doing vibratos so well, but this performance of his really nailed the reason why I love him so much.Aside from the performance, after all the grotesque (yes, this season, not only Noriega deserves this adjective) outfits Paula Ab-DULL has been flaunting, this is her best look so far compared to those sparkly pieces and gloves kinda thing. Whoever dressed her on this episode should keep his/her job.

Move over Anton!

When you say Regine Impersonator in the Philippines, people would immediately refer to Anton Diva as the best in immitating Asia’s Songbird (seriously people, do Asians really even know she’s the songbird?). But the above video is more of the lip sing impersonator. Just watch her roll her eyes and flap her lips. It’s so good I’m speechless after seeing it on TV.

What the?

The question here is not who’s vocalizing, but who’s in the background laughing like a hyena.So there you go guys. Watch out for new entries. My head is filled with ideas ideas ideas.

April 16th, 2008 by Remcyl

I’m so stupid!

I’ve been waiting for this day to come and I’ve been thinking about a lot of things for the past few weeks of school. It has bothered me so much that I’ve been considering a lot of things from every angle.

To give you an idea of what I’m talking about, let me elaborate.

At the end of every semester, every student who is on the verge of failing gets deliberated to see whether or not someone deserves a second chance in continuing. The third year level of the Nursing Department is divided into 2 batches. The first half were those who goes to Manila for the affiliation first, and the second half follows. In the first batch, about one block was deliberated and failed. The list of student numbers were posted on a piece of paper at the ground floor of the department building and all you have to do is talk to your block adviser once you see your number present on the list.

As the days go quickly, the thought just rushes to my mind everytime I see students worrying about their grades. I worry with them since I too am bothered with my grades. I have no idea on what my standing is on class. I was never confident, but I never lost hope.

I have given this whole blogging thing a hiatus just so I could focus on my studies and give time to what was important. Several days that me and Chris didn’t go out so that every after school, we could have a group study and share some informations to each other.

Today is the day our batch’s list is posted and unluckily, my student number, 04-0597 was on the list and that we were to report on April 21 to our block adviser.

My heart was broken. I don’t need to wait for Monday to go to school and talk to my block adviser. Who was I to fool? I would only embarrass myself for being the failure that never made it and yet still had the guts to show my self. I contacted instructors that I was friends with to check on how all these things came about. What was the “talk” with the instructor for? Are there chances of me passing after I have the talk? How on earth will I tell my mom the bad news that struck me?

It’s all over!

And I am stupid!

Stupid for thinking that this is the end. Stupid for how narrow my thinking was at the age I am in who should be possessing courage and spirit.

If there was one thing I’ve learned in this incident, I am happy to say that I’ve learned a lot.

Sure I may have failed, but it’s just school. School which is a part of everyone who’s lucky enough to get education. School that isn’t too far from life itself, that when you fail and stumble, there simply is no way else to go, but pick up where you last took off and go up.

Failing is never a justification of how intelligent you are nor does it justify the kind of person you are. Factors are all considered before you can finally conclude to yourself that you did fail. I have always been a believer of the saying that goes, “The only time you really fail is when you never tried.” I’ve tried!

For the first time in all the failures I’ve made in life specially those with school, this was the first time that my parents were not able to say anything to me. For they know that I tried. Tried to the point that I put myself in a room just so I could have the coziness of studying that I needed. I was shocked to be honest. For the first time also, I saw that I was capable of putting that much effort in studying. I had the push that I needed and longed for such an immeasurable period and it wasn’t even a material incentive, but just the reward of graduating with that diploma in the end.

I was humming to myself the song Chris always sings when we can’t decide to go some place, “Where do we go from here?…”

So where do I go? I have no solid idea as of now, but I’m pretty confident that I’ll be moving forward.

The attitude someone in my position should possess in times like these should be preparedness. For if we won’t be prepared right this moment, then we could never be.

I am teary for one thing after all this. I’m pretty sad for I’ll be missing the best people anyone could ever meet. They deserve a shoutout!

Cherry, for being my ONLY true friend in Upang. The only true friend who had faith in everything I do. My joyous heart kisses your spirit for every kind act you showed me. I will surely miss your bubbly personality.

Rowie, I never expected to have the kind of friendship that I now have with you to be as special as this. What you said to me gave me everything I needed to keep on working.

To Irish and Arvin, I know for the last few days of school I haven’t been talking to you guys. I’m such a jerk. Hope you could have it in you to forgive me after what I did out of reasons so low. I hope you guys would succeed and continue without me in the same school. I’ll surely miss you two.

To Ma’am Dujali, if there was one instructor I fell in love with, it’s you. The chances you gave would make me forever thankful and the faith you had in me I’ll keep and bring with me in life’s next challenges.

Oh well, my tears has watered my face with all the crying in writing this post so I have to stop.

For the last time UoPians, Remcyl Viloria is

April 13th, 2008 by Remcyl

Finally this semester is over! My final examinations just passed and hope I pass as well otherwise, hello beauty school!

I can’t wait to blog during this break and I have all the goodies coming your way tomorrow for I am too busy unwinding here at the apartment right now.

Can anyone spell SIESTA?!!!

April 6th, 2008 by Remcyl

Remcyl’s article on Alcohol post…

Right after making my article about my sister and dad’s alcohol addiction, someone so kind posted it on his site and featured my writing. I felt as though one person alone who got my message and was somehow an inspiration to someone’s life made me fulfilled and got me thinking why I make articles like that.

The thing is, I write about what I think needs to be spoken for. There are a lot I’m sure of those families suffering from problems within themselves because of such addiction and those affected by it are trapped because no one seems to know the kind of “darkness” if you may term it, they are in. But the good news is, they are not alone. And I want them to know that there is groups they could talk to, to help them make it through such troubled times.

From the bottom of my heart, I thank you dear sir for the compliment.

Blogger Beware!

Well, those with troubled relationships that is.

I don’t know if you happened to watch this news days ago (or maybe a week ago) about this Australian blogger who got his 15 minutes of SHAME after posting a blog entry about his Filipino ex-boyfriend.

I know the news is in the Filipino language but for the sake of my international readers (if I have any who are not Filipino) I’d be translating it to the best of my abilities (since I too have difficulty with my own tongue). *Video courtesy of TV Patrol WorldKaren Davila: An Australian native is doing research on how what a blog can do. This is where he is finding justice for the trouble, after the lies and manipulation, his Filipino ex-boyfriend caused him. Gigi Grande, Australian Bureau chief, for the news.Gigi Grande: This is what Australian blogger, Brian Gorrell, sold when he decided to reside in the Philippines. A three bedroom house on top of the rain forest and more than 12-hectares of land for his flower business. As to what happened to the money after selling the property can be found on his blog which is followed by several Filipinos around the world. A blog is an online diary that could be read by anyone who has internet access. In Brian’s blog, he narrated how he sent $70,000 (U.S.) to his Filipino boyfriend, a well-known socialite and columnist in a daily newspaper. The money was intended for what supposed to be a restaurant the two of them would own and a tour-booking company. It was too late when Brian found out that there was no restaurant and that he was scammed.Brian Gorrell: (Girl it’s in English so just watch the video for his statements!) lolGigi Grande: According to the web tracking tool site meter, his blog received 2 million views since it started last March 4. His viewers show their continuous sympathy with his experience. If Filipinos are glued as well, this is because of grandeur stories of Brian’s ex-boyfriend’s peers who are socialites, including the selling and use of drugs at parties.

Brian Gorrell: (Blah blah blah)

Gigi Grande: Any day now, Brian would spill the beans about what he knows about the death of a Filipino socialite a year ago.

Brian Gorrell: (Blah blah blah)

Gigi Grande: Brian needs to surrender the real estate to the new owners within 3 months. He would move out to Canada but he won’t close his blog till he gets his money back. Blogs has proven it’s influence on politics and business. In entertainment, a blog could either send a talent to stardom, or to failure. No one knows whether Brian would succeed. In case he does, this would prove once again, the power of a blog.

Whew!

That was tiring! I just hope my translation would be all worth it if you bitches would read it! LOL

Anyway, the reason for putting this worthy (I believe) topic as an entry is that we could learn a thing or two from this scan-DUHl this Brian Gorrell had to go through.

First of all, I think it is sooo cheapness of Brian to be putting the cat out of the bag just because of his money. I mean, let’s give the sympathy he needs for being scammed with his $70 grand, but come on. Just because of money, not only did you show how low you could go, but also how much of a scumbag you are.

Relationships are supposed to be private as much as possible. Though relationships of celebrities are exposed, I’m pretty sure that is not with consent whatsoever due to the rampant paps. If he has issues unresolved with his ex-boyfriend and that he wants legal actions to push through, why not get a lawyer and legally deal with the subject matter.

A blog can be powerful given that a lot of people now has access to the internet, but the plan to use it to destroy someone’s dignity is overly low and classless. And take note guys, low is a complete understatement.

I’m not saying Brian deserves what he has suffered if this is how it’s all gonna turn out, but I’m not saying either that whoever his ex-boyfriend is deserves what Brian is burning him with.

After all, a break up was a break up for one and one good reason alone, and that is for us to learn the valuable lessons from the relationship that was not meant to be. A lesson to take the blame for the mistakes done, and to forgive the other for the wrong he/she has committed.

Kiss and make up you guys. Come on, if Pope John Paul could forgive the guy who nearly killed him, I think someone who took a small amount of $70,000 wouldn’t be that hard.